Funny Quotes or Sayings: "Technology" Group 2 AT&T to wed T-Mobile. C: "I can't reach." Thanksgiving jokes. Working In IT Support. The man is shocked, as he had never believed in God. At 3:37 a.m. on a Sunday, I had just looked at the clock to determine my annoyance level, when I received a frantic phone call from a new user of a Macintosh Plus. IT humor, Tech Support Stories, Support Ticket Fails, Funny Computer Stories This is Bob Bobson from Microsoft Support. I can't stress this enough. Here is how my file name changes over the course of few days before submitting for approvals. We were trying to think up a group name, apparently 'The Suicide Squad' isn't considered appropriate. See more ideas about Jokes, Tech humor, Computer humor. Backups. Dec 29, 2013 - Sometimes working in tech support can be stressful, so a little humor can go a long way towards putting a smile back on your face.. . HP and Dell, SolarWinds Call Detail Record Tracker Review, Good Jokes and Funny Short Stories and Tales. You wonât need blue light glasses for these computer jokes and IT jokes. Article from howtogeek.com. I’m gonna go get the dogs ready and I’ll be back for your answer.”. Doctor jokes. Customer: Yes, Iâm sure. The Best Tech Jokes . 59 21. Working In IT Support. Because they can’t wait to live in a world with no snowflakes. Family Jokes 26; Famous Jokes 14; Food Jokes 141; Geography Jokes 89; Health Jokes 60; Holiday Jokes 212; Knock Knock Jokes 59; Let me in Jokes 249; Miscellaneous Jokes 280; Money Jokes 35; Movie Jokes 25; Music Jokes 53; Name Jokes 313; Odd Jokes 22; Outdoor Jokes 60; Relationship Jokes 100; School Jokes 50; Sport Jokes 28; Technical Jokes â¦ They were hanging on for dear life. Customer: Netscape. Short & Funny Tech Jokes The internet has provided us with limitless tech jokes, from IT departments, tech support and programmers, users never cease to amaze us and entertain us. Go To Bed. Hell, why stop there, I fully support Cujo as my Vice President because he's such a heckin good boy! Tech Support: âTell me what Youâve done.â Customer: âI typed A:SETUP.â Tech Support: âMaâ am, remove the disk and tell me what it says.â Customer: âIt says [PC manufacturer] Restore â¦ Tech Support Jokes Read More » AJokeADay pays cash prizes to the top 10 most popular clean jokes each week! Sold in both cocktail & dinner sizes. Improper use will cause the system to launch the program Nag Nag 9.5. Advisor: 'I will remove them for you. They were twins - a brother and sister - and they were from China. Back to: People Jokes. Now there is a disabled guy in the White House and all they do is compalain about it. Yo momma is so fat, when she sat on an iPod, she made the iPad! Tech Support: "Your A drive won't work?" 133. How can I fix it?â>... read more Tech support: Thatâs not an anti-virus program. For the first time they were happy with duplicate content. In fact, I support the youth in every continent. On the phone, the man said he even held the printer up in front of â¦ 12 Humorous Signs for your Tech Support Department. That brings up a task list in the middle of the screen. In fact, "Spreadsheet Queen" is my unofficial job title. The little-known rare earth element nauseum (atomic weight 172) has the interesting property so I only have to pay for 4 years of child support instead of 18. Enjoy our collection of funny, geeky, tech, programmer and computer jokes below and make sure to share them with friends and family. "We better get some support or people are gonna think we're nuts!!". I Canât Connect To Wifi. See TOP 10 IT one liners. Mar 28, 2017 - Explore Darlene Berry's board "tech support jokes" on Pinterest. keyboard." There's only so many times you can tell people to turn if off and back on again before you need a giggle. A farmer is worried sick about his horse Reginald who is basically on his death bed. Tech Support Please. Customer: A white one. Tech support: Aaaarrrrgggghhhh!!! April Fool's Day. What is written on Steve Jobs tombstone? Wife 1.0 is a great program, but it tends to be very high maintenance. Tech Support: Have you tried pushing the button? Customer: No, wait a minute, I hadn't inserted itâ¦ Actual Calls to Computer Technical Support Reps Amusing Password Logic Best 10 Tech support jokes Another batch of funny support calls Sponsored Links â Actual Calls to Computer Technical Support Reps Get the right computer â 1 Customer: Iâm â¦ Tech support: Can you tell me what the password was? THOU SHALT NOT CALL TECH SUPPORT. Doug got first with a great piece about racial tensions in America. Please Wait. Oh Youâre Tech Savvy. Yes â¦ Customer: â¦ The woman then responded, 'No, my desk is next to the door. None, if they’re told the lightbulb doesn’t exist, it doesn’t need changing, I’m not sure what to wear, so I’ll probably just come in my pants. Andrew. I'm seeing a lot of new faces here and I must say I'm very disappointed... Because they were too busy posting on Reddit, ...which pales in comparison to the 100% of Americans who support “69 for All”, "Well damn, I didn't expect a round of applause!". Absolutely hillarious IT one-liners! The answer to your piddly-ass problem is probably on the web or in a â¦ But these quotes about IT, tech and computer systems remind us that technical difficulties are a universal experience and there is some humor to be found. Thanks for all the support, guys!! Buy them individually or â¦ More true, funny tech support stories from the IT help desk Most people have faith in the intelligence of mankind, but if you read our article featuring 16 of the funniest help desk tickets as told by IT pros, or these other real help desk mishaps , your trust in humanity might have faltered a bit. "When I die, I want my tombstone to be a WiFi hotspot......that way people visit more often." S: "Uh huh. Manufacturers have quickly adopted to LG's new protocol, as they are afraid of not supporting the LGBT. Tech Support: "Did it not in... read more Please share this message. Tech Support: That doesn't sound good; I'll make a note. Lawyer jokes. Tech Support: "I am sorry sir, but there is nothing â¦ Tech Support in Computer Jokes. 1) Customer: 'My disk ran out of space when trying to save my Word document, so I changed it from double spaced to single spaced and it still wouldn't fit!' Get the right computer - 2 Tech support: What kind of computer do you have? "Have you tried turning it on and back off again? Thank You For Calling. I can't get my DVD out !!! The largest collection of IT one-line jokes in the world. They were take by advisors at BT, HP and Dell. 133 30. Sometimes working in tech support can be stressful, so a little humor can go a long way â¦ Wife 1.0 comes with several support programs, such as Clean and Sweep 3.0, Cook It 1.5, and Do Bills 4.2. Hell is wallpapered with all your deleted selfies. Submit A joke. Good evening everyone. At the gates of heaven, Saint Peter is waiting for him. _____ Customer: Hi, this is Celine. Well, can you see if â¦ You Have 3 Phds. Read the funniest jokes about Computers' support staff ... Technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was hard to control with the dust cover on. Not wanting to ruin his reputation or his marriage, he paid her a large sum of money if she would go to Italy to secretly have the child. Sit in the dark saying it's working ti someone questions it. Jokes! A Dell Rolling in the Deep. We Get Paid. Captcha. ", Gets inside the house and sees his fathers shoes. I saw my colleague do it. We are seeing a lot of virus activity from your device.â Me: âOh no. Tech Support; may I help you?Yes, well, I'm having trouble with WordPerfect.What sort of trouble?Well, I was just typing along, and all of a... the joke is just one of many funny jokes on Joke Buddha! Tech Support in Computer Jokes. Have a co-worker about to hit his working anniversary and I'd love to have a couple of jokes about people who work at a place for a long time. Jokes about Computers' support staff. - Paul Ehrlich. 30 Elbert Hubbard Quotes on Work, Love and Laughter. "We went behind the village tavern where you leaned against the back fence and I made love to you. But that is a good point. 38. Then that person is fired because there is no broken light bulbs. joke bank -Technology Jokes . ", The sky clouded above his head and, in a booming voice, the Lord said, “Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish.” The biker pulled over and said, “Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want.”. I had been doing Tech Support for Hewlett-Packard's DeskJet division for about a month when I had a customer call with a problem I just couldn't solve. It’s good to see them supporting their right to bare arms. Just check out our tech support meme collection below to know more! NOT-Microsoft support: âHello. Policeman jokes. We're reposting for karma.". See TOP 10 IT one liners. Their white sheets aren't clean from the last rally yet. Absolutely hillarious IT one-liners! Free jokes, tech support humor at Tess' Castle In The Sky. However, be very careful how you use these programs. Will and Guy bring you the most bizarre tech support stories from computer, phone and related technical supprot help lines. Following the ceremony there will be no reception. 30. If she stayed in Italy to raise the chi. So, the doctor sets it to 10% and asks the husband how he feels. C: "No." You Called Us Claiming. We have collected the funniest calls to computer tech support departments at Dell BT and HP. Are you sure?â NOT-Microsoft support: âOh yes, we have many reports.â Me: âOh jeez. I just got kicked out of my support group for those chronically depressed with PTSD. Tech support: Are you sure you used the right password? bigger and better idiots. on the BOTTOM of this keyboard! Click here for more information. The pilot gets on the loudspeaker and tells the cabin that if they look to their right, they'll see the pearly gates and the shining city beyond. Mar 3, 2014 - Explore BeAnywhere's board "Tech Support Jokes" on Pinterest. You have my Word! Programming today is a race between software engineers striving to build Maybe if we start telling people the brain is an app they will start using it. 103. He shakes his head and refuses to say anything. Tech Support: âOK Bob, letâs press the control and escape keys at the same time. The first word that came to my head was "RoBlowjob", They both don’t show up to vote when it matters. Maybe if we start telling people the brain is an app they will start using it. Do not be racist; be like Mario. When I was in high school - in 10th or 11th grade I think - our class got two new students about midway through the school year. One, with a sign reading *It's time to GO!,* spotted them and quickly approached. They want to make sure nobody comes. Customer: Yes, I'm sure it's really stuck. Customer: (now rather humbled) "But you're supposed to help!" S: "Follow it for me, and tell me if it's plugged securely into the back of your computer." Funny Computers' support staff Jokes. C: "Okay, here it is." tweet; RELATED ARTICLES MORE FROM AUTHOR. I hate to think of what will happen to him when he leaves the house. A man attempting to set up his new printer called the printerâs tech support number, complaining about the error message: âCanât find the printer.â. Female customer: A white one... Change of Mind Customer: I keep getting inappropriate pop-ups on my computer and don't want my wife to think that it's me.'. They don't want to talk to you, period. A husband goes to his wife and says “You’re either going hunting with me, sucking my cock or I’m fucking you in the ass. Customer: Five stars. A co-worker was trying to get an obviously novice user to press the Somebody stole my new Microsoft Office last week and they are going to pay! He's an Italian plumber, who was made by the Japanese, speaks English, looks like a Mexican, jumps like a black man, and grabs coins like a Jew! Reboot your joke collection with these funny computer jokes, wifi puns and tech jokes that donât require a restart. They are saying it will be the most superior race in town.